Skip to content

Found: Workout Tights with Powerlift

Lorna Jane “Amy” 3/4 tights
I have refused to wear workout tights since 1997.
Instead I have opted for baggy yoga pants or trackies made from thin jersey. Now, if you’ve ever sweated during excercise you’ll know just how impractical, uncomfortable and awkward bunched up damp jersey is between your legs. (Unless of course you’re a Sumo wrestler).
And if you’re losing baby weight, you’ll know that you need to sweat! A lot.
You see, I have the family thighs. Our family thighs are genetically related to telegraph poles. 
Any form of Lycra wrapped around them only makes them resemble two cling wrapped tree trunks. They are sturdy legs. My mother always tells me whenever I (frequently) complain ” you’ve got two of them and they both work”. For which I’m grateful. However, a slightly more aesthetically pleasing shape would have been appreciated.
My post baby butt isnt helping the thigh issue either. I used to quite like my butt, until it decided to lose it’s posture entirely, turn to jelly and reposition itself behind my knees.
This week however, in my post baby haze (and possibly during a sugar craving) I have broken my no-workout-tights rule.
I don’t know what got into me, but I threw caution to the wind and actually tried on a pair. 
I planned on Zumba-ing in the safety of my own lounge room, without the General Public being exposed to my butt/thigh issue. So I figured some comfortable tights could be okay.
Some fashion rules are meant to be broken – and boy am I glad I broke this one!!
Wow, wow and WOW!!!

Lorna Jane, you and your clever design team could just rid the world of unshapely thighs. Forever. They should win a Pulitzer Prize equivalent or something.

 These little babies will be the best $80.99 you spend on your butt. You see, their secret weapon is, get ready for it…. Butt. Lifting. Technology.
(pause for gasp)
I. Know!!!
And you guess what? It WORKS!
They feel like a body shaper (Nancy Gantz, Trinny & Susannah) in that they suck in all your wobbly bits so when you walk – nothing moves. It’s the equivalent of a thigh corset! That lifts your butt!! And the wide flat waistband flattens out your tummy without creating a muffin top overhang. Genius.
There are also two arc shaped seams running down the side that give a slimming optical illusion, and they remind kinda me of Olympic swimming suits.
And that makes me want to train like an athlete.
 
I am so invincible in my new power tights, I actually want to exercise.
They make me feel skinny and light as a feather so I want to wear them under all my clothes, all the time.  I wish I had more than one pair. I have even started wearing them around the house when I’m not excercising. Which means that I just start doing squats or star jumps spontaneously in between loads of washing, wiping The Toddlers nose or changing The Baby.
And then the unthinkable happened – I wore them outside the house!!!
IN PUBLIC.
And people SAW me.
AND no one turned to stone, went blind or even gasped out loud.
And even if they did and I couldn’t hear them, because I felt great!!
These pants have saved my butt (and thighs).
Every Glamour Mama should have a pair.
What are your favourite workout pants?
Kate xx
Image Credit: Lorna Jane website
* This is NOT a sponsored post
Advertisements
No comments yet

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s

%d bloggers like this: